If life emerged as a mathematical necessity, then subjected to natural selection on individual basis, would the life in particular for a person, be a predesigned event?

Quests for the mystery of organization have been endless. My quest for tantalizing but dangling laws of nature, witnessed daily yet escaped all but invariably, at all levels of observation, has been shuttling between passion and utter frustrations. Like most molting worms, people renew themselves both in body and mind. Inevitably, I felt very much the same way as I head alone for a life of my own on my own, facing ambiguity and uncertainty, making hard choices. One of the things, as you grow of age, is the easily elicited flash-backs when the proper triggers are pulled. Mental incentives, either as aucoustic notes or visual stimuli, come as harder strikes with the increment of age. The turbulence of earthly events pushed people to seek for the peace of mind, the Eden of free thoughts and complete release of intellectual power.

It is foolish to put career and family into separate boxes, but as a transit phase of social and cultural evolution, are we 1980's the ready for the new or the prepared for the old? It sounded as if this decade is destined to take a leap of faith a the forken road. Those heading for the unknown, convinced that they are capable of moulding the landscape, and thereby choosing their destiny at the mercy their own hands. The fearless 1980's. I'd embrace this idea, since I am avidly one of them, that instead of knowing where you are heading, the excitement came from what you can create. The impetus is the stimulating memories, positively modified or even tailored to the imaginary, springs ultimate force of marching, and the dare to chart the thorned lands. Belief in infinity gives birth to the creation of ultima, and the faith that an edge never is the edge, that inceasible power of mind and self-activating motives will perpetually drive the locamotion of the capable.

Back on a practical note, sometimes I thought if I could ever live my path all over again, should I be endorsing history or rather create yet another trajectory looked more plausible in my current eyes. Thoughts on that, more often than not, have gone with the wind, with the ecstasy that we are at home in the universe, capable of all creation.

With a constant bewildering of redefining meaning of existence, as socially collapsed entities, with individuality so much readily distinguished as inherent character craves, I, descendant of ancient spirits for my clan, have sought for more than years of knowledge to even getting started to addressing this question. Sitting, or more often standing in the niche of the universe as it is currently defined, probed and depicted, the question extend to more than earthly concerns would have ever come to contact with.

Recent effort, much less perhaps, but more of an attempt to uncover partly what my inheritance come from, I had been engaged in a lot of conversations with people I never thought I would care to know, if I were the old me, that is. It turns out more than surprising that I almost surely found a girl that resembles me in every respect except for gender. The genetic comparison has yet to be made, but the resonance of mind reminds me of belong to something bigger than the organization of the biosphere than it may have seem to be.

The cosmic waves may not just be peculiar to the void of outer space; we also emit them. The interference of those waves may have resulted in many things that currently escapes a lot of the scientists' notice. In an effort to try to find my other part, I am starting to realize that there are questions, seriously independent of what I initially set out to look for, that solicits my attention, so much that I even started to ignore the temptation of getting what I sought for. The very existence of such phenomena begs an explanation, an answer which by itself will unveil serendipities that go far beyond the cortex power of our limited minds.

Upon that note, I almost embedded myself in the thinking, less specific to myself but to the larger landscape, the endless chain of inquisitions would have been ejected, should it being unleashed in another way. Herein, lies what inevitably would emerge for the progress of our understanding - heresy at first as it may seem - but more excitement, elevated to the highland of spiritual realm, that would likely point to the elucidation of the big whys on our very existence.